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I've got a Feeling for Mika!!!
Went to see Charlie Wilson's War
this morning. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. It deals with a
difficult subject matter -- a senator in the 1980s who helped fund a
fightback against the Russian in Afghanistan. Up to about seven years
ago, of course, he would have been seen as a clearcut hero -- but a
consequence of his actions was the 9/11 attack on the States and the
war that has raged since then. I thought the film would shy away from
that, and while it doesn't exactly tackle it head-on (Wilson is
portrayed as an idealistic hero), it does bring it in towards the end.
It raises an interesting question, one I don't think any of us truly
knows the answer to -- is it right to do something for a good cause
that turns out to be bad later on? The people of Afghanistan suffered
terribly at the hands of the Russians, but if Wilson hadn't helped fund
the war, maybe they wouldn't have overthrown the Russians, and maybe
9/11 would never have happened. Of course, if the initial aid had been
followed up - if new schools had been built, and hospitals, and the new
government helped openly and generously - maybe that would have steered
the extremists away from power. But there's no getting away from the
fact that by helping them, he helped America's enemies grow strong --
but the ordinary, innocent people of Afghanistan needed
to be helped. One thing this film pinpoints is that the world is never
as simply black or white as many politicians would have us believe it
is. It's a complex, multi-layered mystery, and anyone who tells you
otherwise (step forward, Georgie Bush) needs to be regarded with deep
and unreserved suspicion.
I went to see Walk Hard
afterwards. That was a far less thought-provoking experience! A fun
musical mock biopic, it stars John C Reilly, who will of course be
stepping into the shoes of a certain Larten Crepsley next month! Reilly
was the real reason I went to see this, and I have to say I was
impressed. I've seen him in lots of other films, but this was the first
time I'd seen him since the news of his casting in the CDF movie was
announced, so I was watching him with special interest. It's a comedy,
but he plays parts of it straight, and I think in those parts you can
see why the movie-makers have gone for him -- he has a strange
intensity about him at times, and if they focus on this in the movie, I
think he'll make a strong Mr Crepsley. Of course if they ask him to ham
it up, that could be a different story entirely ... Let's keep our
fingers crossed that they let him do a good job with the part!!!!
After
a pizza for dinner, Bas and I strolled down to the area just beneath
the London Eye to watch the launch of the Fiat 500 car. Because of
where we live, we got free tickets to their prestigious event. But why,
you might wonder, were we bothered about seeing the launch of a new
car, particularly given the fact that I said in a blog just a few days
ago that I have no interest in cars at all?!? Well, while the car
didn't excite us, part of the launch involved short gigs by The Feeling and Mika!!!
Bas likes Mika, but she absolutely LOVES The Feeling -- we're going to
see them in Birmingham in March -- and when she heard they were playing
on our doorstep, she almost fainted!!!! We weren't sure we had tickets
for it until just before it started, and when it was confirmed, she
jumped about for joy!!! I like The Feeling too, and I can even tolerate
Mika, so I was happy to go along. They only played 4 songs each, for
about 20 minutes each, but it was very enjoyable. The best thing,
though, was having to simply walk for a minute or so afterwards to get
back home -- nice!!!!! If only all concerts were so easy to get to ...
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Saturday, January 19, 2008 |
Went to the London Art Fair to have a look round yesterday. I preferred
it to Frieze -- not as massive, and more of the art was to my liking
(not so much "conceptual art"). I didn't see much that I wanted to buy
(although I might try and get a statue, if I can get the seller to
lower the price a bit), but it was nice to wander around and see lots
of different styles and approaches. The good thing about an art fair
(or gallery or museum) is you'll virtually always find something
that you like. The trick is to cast your eye widely, to quickly scan
painting and sculptures, only stopping for a really good look if
something catches your eye. Of course that's a risky -- you might walk
by and miss a piece that you'd love if you spotted it -- but with
thousands of items to contend with, it's the only way if you don't want
to give yourself a headache!!!!
Went to see No Country For Old Men,
the latest Coen Brothers film. The Coens are two of my favourite
movie-makers. Their last few films haven't been so hot, but this is a
solid return to form. It was adapted from a Cormac McCarthy book, which
I was worried about -- I know plenty of people who swear McCarthy is
the best writer of the last 20 or 30 years, but I've always found his
work off-putting and hard to get into; I read a couple of his books,
but had to concede in the end that he just wasn't for me. But they've
adapted it expertly. I felt it lost its way a bit towards the end, but
for the most part it was a tense, brilliantly acted, violent affair.
After a few drinks with a couple of Bas's friends, we went to see a new version of Othello
in the Donmar Theatre. Tickets for this sold out almost instantly,
because it's a very small theatre -- it holds 250 -- and Ewan McGregor
was playing Iago. Also, Chiwetel Ejiofor (another movie star, not as
well known as McGregor, but at least as highly respected in the
industry) was playing Othello. On top of that, almost all of the
reviews have been glowing -- often, when you get big names in a show,
it turns out to be a disappointment because it can't match your
expectations, but this didn't have that problem. I managed to procure a
couple of tickets through eBay, and glad I am that I did -- it as
excellent!!!! Othello is a
great play anyway, but they've done it magnificently here. The cast is
great (not just the two leads), the staging is good, and the pace is
perfect. This is Shakespeare as it should be, vicious, pacy, edgy,
modern. The version of King Lear
I saw a few weeks ago was very stiff and archaic by comparison
(regardless of Ian McKellen's fine performance). If you can somehow get
your hands on a ticket to this little baby, sell everything you own to
fund the purchase!!!!! Or, as Iago would have said, "Put money in your
pocket!"
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Thursday, January 17, 2008 |
Did a school event in London this morning, at St Michael's school. It
was my first of 2008, and my only one planned until I go to Hungary in
late April. It went very well -- the kids were quiet when I was
speaking, they asked lots of good questions, and they bought lots of
books which was a nice bonus. I never judge a school event by the
number of books sold -- schools are rarely the best place to be selling
items -- but it is always nice when sales are brisk, and today they
were very brisk indeed! If all my events in 2008 go as well as this
one, I'll be a very happy Shan!!
Back home I had a couple of
meetings with air conditioning experts. My new flat is on the top floor
of the building and it soaks up the heat in summer. We struggled
through last year, but we weren't here very much, and the weather
wasn't great, so it wasn't too bad. But we need AC and we need it bad!!
I'm generally not a fan of it -- having had no need for it previously
in Ireland or London, I find it quite alien and often turn if off when
I'm in hotels -- but in this instance it's something of a necessity, or
I'll be sweating so much, the people downstairs will need umbrellas!!!!
I don't think I'm going to be able to put on an extractor fan outside,
because of where I live, but apparantly there's a newish system which
runs off of water and is completely internal, so hopefully I'll be able
to get that installed ...
After that I spend most of the
afternoon and evening fiddling about with a PDA -- a little handheld
device that should allow me to check my emails and surf the web when
I'm abroad or on tour. I've resisted travelling with a laptop for all
these years, and I'm still resisting, but whereas internet cafes used
to be common, nowadays they're dying out, since so many places have
wi-fi. A PDA seems to be the way forward -- it'll let me keep in touch
with the important stuff, and then if I want to spend more time online,
I can track down a proper PC. I've had virtually no experience of PDAs,
so it was a bit of a steep learning curve. I felt completely lost when
I began!!! But once I figured out the basics, I began to fly. That's
the good thing about most modern technological gismos -- if you're
confident enough to experiement a bit, and can figure out the first few
moves, you'll normally pick up the pace pretty quickly. I don't fancy
tapping in a full blog entry on it, but I'm sure I'll end up doing that
sooner or later, probably some night on tour when I've got a few hours
to kill and there are no on-demand movies available on my TV ...
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Wednesday, January 16, 2008 |
Flew over to London today. Went through the mail that had piled up in
the flat. Then Bas and I caught the tube over to the O2 arena in the
Millennium Dome to see ... The Spice Girls!!!! Yes, readers, you read
that right -- the Dark Prince of Children's Horror went to a Spice
Girls concert!!!! In my defence, I can say, hand on heart, that Bas
wanted to go far more than I did. She loves cheesy music, stuff like
Take That, Boyzone, etc. She's a good sport, and has come to many of my
concerts, performeres like The Who, Nick Cave, Morrissey, etc. So it
was time to return the favour. But, having said that, I would have
drawn the line at the likes of Take That -- life is just too short --
but I have to admit I'v always had a slight interest in the Spice
Girls. I would stop well short of calling myself a fan, but I never
hated their music, and I liked the buzz about them, the fun they exuded
when they first burst onto the scene, the energy they put into their
music and shows. In fact, I based Debbie Hemlock on Scary Spice!!!!! So
Bas didn't exactly have to drag me kicking and screaming to the
show!!!!!!
And did I enjoy it? Yes, actually, for the most part
I did. The girls all look stunning, the songs are good, they performed
them well, they covered all their hits, the costumes were fun, and it
ticked along at a fair old speed. Of course it felt manufactured and
robotic -- that's my main gripe with put-together bands like this, the
falseness of it all, the fake bonhomie -- but it didn't feel too
cynical. There weren't any surprises in the pack -- their hits are very
good, but the other material on their albums was never up to scratch,
and the few non-single songs they sung tonight were simply there to pad
things out. But they sung in tune, danced seductively, and scored big
on their better songs, like Spice Up Your Life, Viva Forever and Wannabe.
A great gig? No, by no means. But a fun night out? Absolutely. All
together now ... "Slam it to the left if you're having a good time!!!!"
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Tuesday, January 15, 2008 |
Bas likes driving in her car!
Bas got a new car yesterday, which has been the highlight of a lazyish
couple of days. I've been doing some bits and pieces on the internet,
and replacing many of my videos with DVDs -- I go through a spurt every
so often where I go through my list of videos, find those which are now
available on DVD, and order replacements. The last time I did it, lots
of the movies were not yet available on DVD -- now most of them are,
and at knockdown prices in most instances! It's great when technology
finally catches up!!! Yesterday afternoon I interrupted myself
to go with Bas to get the new car -- a Skoda, like her old car, but a
nicer model. I don't drive -- I never learnt how, and at this point in
my life I doubt I ever will -- so this was as close as I'm likely to
get to the buzz that must come from buying a new car!!! While it was
nowhere near as exciting for me as it was for Bas -- to me, cars are
just a way of getting from A to B; I have little or not interest in
different makes or models, I just want something that's reliable and
good value for money -- I did enjoy the moment of sitting in for the
first time and taking off. We stopped off to collect a Chinese
takeaway, so that we could celebrate the new purchase in style back
home!!!! She's been busy driving around in it since, getting used to
it, showing it to my Mum and Dad. Imagine how much less fun life would
be if we didn't have people to show our new toys to! Part of the fun in
getting something new is just getting in -- but a lot of the fun is
being able to share it with your friends and family, to have them coo
over it and say nice things. We're all just big kids deep down -- when
we were babies, we needed people to make farting noises by putting
their lips on our stomachs and blowing to make us laugh; as adults, we
have to be a bit more stately about it and find other ways to get that
sense of satisfaction, but at heart it's the same thing -- "Blow on my
belly! Admire my new car!! Yayyyyyyyy!!!!!" Saw the movie of the musical Rent
last night. Wasn't overly impressed. It had some good songs, and the
cast were impressive, but it had virtually no story and it went on
forever! I don't think I'll be going to see it live on stage any time
soon!! Tonight I saw 21 Grams.
I don't know why I hadn't watched it before now -- I've had it on my
shelf ever since it was released. A damn fine movie from one of the
most exciting directors at work today. It was a little bit too
complicated to begin with, but once it settled down a bit and I was
able to figure out the main thrust of the story, it was gripping all
the way to the end. Highly recommended. I've also been busy
replying to fan mail. I'm almost through my latest pile. I meant to
finish it off tonight, but time got away from me -- we had to go show
off the car to my parents and grandparents! But worry not -- if you
wrote to me any time in the last couple of months, and haven't yet
received a reply, you should get one before the end of the month. Just
make sure, when you get it, that you show it to your family and friends
so they can sahre the love!!! "Blow on my belly! Read my letter from Darren Shan!! Yayyyyy!!!!!!!"
Finished editing City of the Snakes
today. Flew through the book far faster than I thought I would, to my
great delight -- it means I can potter about a bit the next few days,
maybe update my site and bit and do some other bits and pieces. There's
still a long way to go with the book -- I'm sure I'll got through it at
least another 2 or 3 times before it sees print -- but I'm very pleased
with how it stands at the moment. I'm especially fond of the ending --
I think it has a nice, wrap-up-all-the-loose-ends- of-the-series last
few chapters. I had a warm feeling when I wound my way down to the
final line, like I get with a long book or series that I've invested a
lot of time in as a reader. I hope that's a good sign, and that fans
enjoy it as much as I do, but I guess we'll have to wait until 2010 to
find that out ... There's been lots of media comments about Salma Hayek's casting in the CDF
movie, most of it focusing on the fact that she'll be appearing with a
beard!! My favourite was The News of the World in the UK, which wasted
no time in putting together an artist's sketch of how she might look
with a beard!!!! I must say, it's an absolutely awful bit of digital
trickery, but I think it wasn't intended too seriously, so it made me
chuckle. You can check it out here: NOTW PIC
Of course, what most of the reporters don't realise is that Truska
isn't bearded ALL the time -- she only grows the beard on stage, as
part of her act!! Still, it's generated plenty of headlines, so I think
we'll keep that little secret beween ourselves for the time being -- so
no talking to any of the press about it, OK?!?!? Saw a very impressive German film called Das Experiment,
about a group of men who take part in an experiment where some of them
get to act as prisoners and others as their guards. It's obviously
fascinating as a comment on this age of reality TV (for which I have
almost complete contempt -- in my view reality TV for the most part is
the basest, dumbest, most mind-numbing waste of TV airtime imaginable),
but surprisingly it's actually based on a real-life experiment which
was conducted in the 1970s!! I also worked on updating my DVD files
today (with over 4000 movies in my collection, I have to put a lot of
work into keeping them all in order!!), and replied to a batch of fan
mail tonight. The one question which crops up most often (and I think
every other writer gets this too) is "Where do your ideas come from?"
-- although it can also be phrased as "Where did you get your idea for
the book?" or "What inspired the book?" It's a question I virtually
never reply to, because the answer would be too long and too dull. So
if you're ever writing to me, and want to save some ink, my advice
would be not to bother with that one!!! It doesn't annoy me -- no
question ever does, even that other favourite, "Is there going to be a
movie?" -- it's just a question that I automatically blank out these
days. As soon as I start reading a question like that now, my eyes
immediately scan forward to the next line -- since I know I'm not going
to answer it, I don't want to waste time reading it!!!! When you get as
much post as I do, you have to start skim-reading at times -- otherwise
you won't be able to reply to everyone!!!!!!
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Saturday, January 12, 2008 |
I don't normally express my personal religious or political views on my
site, message board or blogs -- I don't want to be seen as someone who
promotes their own views in their books. I like to explore all sorts of
different angles when I'm writing, to let characters be left or right
wing, Christian or Muslim or whatever. One of the reasons I write is
because I'm interested in looking at the world through the differing
eyes of my characters, to try to make sense of it by experiencing it in
various ways. But a few days ago on my message board, I let slip that I
hate George Bush (something I've stated before, on several occasions,
and which I make no bones about -- I think he's the most appalling
leader Americans could have elected, and any American I've ever met has
said exactly the same thing, so I don't feel too guilty about making my
feelings known!!!), and that I hope Barack Obama gets nominated by the
Democrats and elected in the next election. In return, somebody asked
why I preferred Obama to Hilary Clinton, and since I'd pinned my flag
to the mast, I figured it was only fair that I explain. Here's what I
said:
He brings something
different and fresh to the table. Hilary is a very skilled politician,
but a politician through and through -- a well-oiled, effective, but
cynical, emotionless (despite her nicely timed crying exhibition for
the cameras), calculating operator. She'd probably be a good leader,
but I don't think she'll try to rock the boat or bring about change --
as much as I liked old Bill, he didn't do too much to try and change
the world, and I don't see his missus doing any differently. I'm
excited about the possibility of Obama getting elected, and it's been a
long time since any politician excited me. Of course, the last one to
fire my imagination this way was Tony Blair, and he worked out horribly
in the end -- he started so positively, but Iraq will stand out as his
defining mistake; I think he'd still be in No 10 if he hadn't so
stubbornly followed his gut instinct instead of using his head (there
never were weapons of mass destruction, never would have been -- the
assault on Iraq was entirely unjustifiable; nobody argues that Saddam
Hussein was an evil bit of work, but that was no reason to invade a
country and reduce it to the war-torn hellhole that it has become).
Maybe
Obama is a fake, someone who will let ultimate power corrupt him,
who'll fade on the biggest platform in the world and crumble under the
pressure. But I don't think so. I think it's worth giving him a shot.
We know what we'll get from Hilary (at best, a calm maintaining of the
status quo, lots of earnest speeches but no real actions). Maybe --
just maybe -- Obama will actually try to change the world and tackle
the issues that need tackling ...
I hope he gets the chance. I really do. Because it could be a long time
before America is again given the opportunity to elect someone of his
calibre and promise.
Oh, by the way, getting away from politics, according to IMDB, Ken Watanabe has joined the cast of the Cirque Du Freak
movie. I don't have any other confirmation of this yet, but I know the
makers wanted him on board, so I suspect it's true. If so, to the best
of my knowledge he will be playing the part of Mr Tall. Ken Watanabe is Japanese, and he has starred in a number of high-profile films over the years, including Letters From Iwo Jima, Batman Begins and The Last Samurai. I will confirm his addition to the cast as soon as I can.
Ladies, grab your beards!!
I found out today that Salma Hayek has joined the cast of the Cirque Du Freak movie
-- cause for celebration, in my opinion!!! I think Hayek is a rarity in
the acting world -- a beautiful woman who is also a very strong
actress. She will be playing Truska, the bearded lady, a role that has
been expanded from the books -- she'll be a more important character in
the film, with more to do. If it goes well, I suspect beards may become
the de rigeur fashion accessory for high society women next year -- my
advice to all you ladies is to buy yours now, before prices
sky-rocket!!!  I edited another 50 pages of City of the Snakes -- I'm hoping to finish it over the weekend, although it might trickle over into Monday. I also finally
finished packaging all of the prizes for the competition I ran on the
Shanville Monthly in December -- I've been working on those all week, a
few every night!!! Contrary to what many of you might think, I don't
have a secretary. The redoubtable Pablo collects all of my mail for me,
and writes the addresses on the return envelopes before passing them on
to me, but I do everything else myself, from filing all my paperwork to
checking emails from fans to updating my web site to packaging and
posting prizes in competitions that I run. (I'm big into recycling, so
all of the books are sent out in recycled envelopes or boxes -- of
course, I have to peel off the old address stickers from them first,
which can often take a few minutes, and then sellotape them shut.) I
probably should have somebody doing all of that stuff for me, leaving me free just to write. But ... well ... I like
doing it!!! It can be annoying and dull at times, but I think it's kind
of cool. If I was a kid writing to one of my favourite authors, I'd
love to think of them personally sending a book to me, and picking at a
Play.com sticker and cursing because the damn things are so securely
stuck on and they're just trimmed their fingernails!! It's very easy to
let yourself be separated from your fanbase if you enjoy a little
success, but I think that's a bad thing. If it ever becomes unavoidable
-- if the books get so popular that I'm receiving more mail than I can
cope with, or if my personal life changes (e.g. if I have kids, or my
health deteriorates) and it proves too much a of a hassle, then
obviously I'll hire in some help. But as long as I can, I want to
struggle on by myself. Bridging the gap between myself and you lot just
tickles my fancy!!!!! Have a great weekend, y'all -- and ladies, I'm serious about those beards!!!!!
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Thursday, January 10, 2008 |
I've been hard at work on editing City of the Snakes.
I've been getting through more than 50 pages every day. I haven't had
to make any real structural changes, just tighten it up a lot. There
was a nice twist halfway through, a scene that made me grin when I came
back to it again. Most of the time when I'm writing, I don't think
about my audience or consider how people are going to react. But every
so often I find myself thinking about my readers and how they'll
respond, and those are some of the best moments of writing for me. I'm
certain, when people who've read the first two books come to this
point, they're going to have the same grin on their faces that I had
when I hit it yesterday, and that connection - even though nobody will
get to read the book for another two years - pleases me greatly. What's
even better is that it's a twist that sharp readers will be able to
anticipate if they're paying attention, but one that I think most will
miss. Those are always my favourite twists -- the ones which are
obvious in retrospect (such as the one involving the title in Book 12
of The Saga, or Harkat Mulds
or Juni Swan's true identities), but which most readers never realise
until it's revealed, at which point they groan, "Why the hell didn't I
see THAT coming?!?"
Of course, those who DO see it coming never
have quite the same reaction -- indeed, some don't like it when I allow
them to second-guess me; they want complete surprises, twists that are
impossible to predict. (They're wrong, by the way, as I've said before
-- the best twists are always those which can be predicted. A good
story should always signpost its twists, not TOO obviously, but having
unexpected things happen all the time, just to keep throwing readers,
is bad story-telling.) Those people often find it hard to believe that
not all readers saw what they saw. Like those who figured out the twist
in The Sixth Sense, they
think that surely EVERYONE must have been able to do it, since - to
them - it's so obvious. But that's the trick about a really cool twist
-- yes, it IS obvious when you figure it out, but most people don't!!!
After book 10 of The Saga
came out, my Message Boards were full of people claiming they'd cracked
the Harkat mystery far in advance, and saying how obvious it was, and
anyone who didn't see it coming was a fool -- but I have a long memory,
and I can't recall more than 2 or 3 mentioning it before that book was
released. Maybe all those super-sleuths kept quiet beforehand, so as not to spoil the twist for others. Or maybe they were just being wise after the fact ...
Anyway, I love a good, slyly telegraphed twist, and City of the Snakes contains one of my favourites, so I hope you all enjoy it when you get to read the book in 2010!!!!
On the movie front, recently I saw Notes on a Scandal,
a very sly, dark comedy (or tragedy, depending on how you look at it),
brilliantly acted and sharply paced -- strongly recommended. I finally
caught up with The Faculty (I can't believe I never saw it before!!), and while it's totally throwaway trash, it's nicely handled and lots of fun. Thank You For Smoking
is an amusing satire of the spin-doctor syndrome, which neatly avoids
the sentimental pitfalls such films normally fall into. And I've just
seen half of the third Pirates of the Caribbean
film -- I'll probably watch the second half later tonight. Johnny Depp
is still wonderful as Captain Jack, and the effects are commendable,
but boy is it long!!! The second film was at least half an hour too
long, and this one's even longer!! I really do enjoy this series, but
how much better it would have been if someone had just told the
director to make each segment no longer than two hours ...
Aaarrrrrrr!!!!!!
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Tuesday, January 08, 2008 |
Edited another 50-plus pages of City of the Snakes.
I'm flying through it. It's been so long since I last worked on it that
it's a pleasure to read. I'm sure, as I re-edit it over the next couple
of years, that I'll start to tire of it by the end, as I always do --
you reach a point on any book where it becomes a burden, something you
just want to be rid of, to launch at the world and never have to read
through again. But at the moment I'm having a blast!!! I definitely
think it's a strong story. It builds neatly, smoothly, getting darker
and more twisted with every chapter. The strange thing is I can't
recall how I put it together in the first place, where the initial
ideas came from, how I plotted it, what was there in the first draft
and what I added or altered later. I can clearly remember certain books
that I've written, where I was when I first thought of them, how they
changed in later drafts, what I was thinking and what I wanted to do
with them. But others are mysteries, books that I look back on years
later and wonder, "Where the hell did THAT come from?!?" This is one of
those. I KNOW I wrote it, that I developed the characters and wove all
the plot lines together, and I recall what's coming next as I move
along, further into the story, jumping at least one step ahead every
time I come to a twist. But I can't for the life of me actually remember writing it!!!!
That
might see unusual, but for me it isn't. I'm always looking ahead to the
next book, eager to try something new, to move forward. I'm not a
writer who works exclusively on one book for years at a time, who has
only a few stories to tell, who creates one body of work that he knows
inside out. I love to experiment, to set new goals, to scale new
heights and plumb new depths. What I've done in the past doesn't really
interest me -- I'm only bothered about what lies ahead, what I can do
next, where I'll go from here. When I'm done with a book, I usually
forget about it. If I have to return to it -- as I have done with my City Trilogy
-- I know I can hit the ground running and slip back into the world of
the book with ease. Otherwise it's history, and while it might be
history that I'm proud of, history that I remember fondly, history that
defines who I am and how I'll best be remembered, it's still the past,
and the past is dead as far as I'm concerned. Maybe one day I'll stop
and re-read all my old work and pat myself on the back and live in the
past. That won't be so bad if I do -- nothing wrong with nostalgia. But
for the time being I'm running with new ideas, looking forward, focused
on the next challenge. I'm not averse to cannibalising my past work, as
I'm doing with this book, but I don't want to live in the past. There
are too many stories I still want to tell -- I don't have time to look
back and remember.
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